'Tis The Season to Turn Inwards?

Maybe it is because I am an 'autumn baby' (born at the beginning of November), or maybe it is just because I am the way that I am, but in any case I simply love Fall! I love the weather - still sunny and bright like the summer, but with a refreshing breath of cool in the mornings and evenings. The gentle easing in of the crisp relief from summer's heat somehow even makes the shortening of days bearable. Although "the holiday season" (or "christmas") is not my favorite time of year, I do not feel dread at the thought of impending winter. It will arrive, so why waste this beautiful season dreading it?

According to an email that I recently received from an astrologer acquaintance of mine, noting that (Monday) Sept 22nd was the Autumn Equinox (seasonally recognised as the first day of Autumn/Fall), "equinoxes are points in space and time representing a time of balance and intense change, and are symbolically observed as a time of rebirth." It seems fitting then that I be embarking on an inward journey at this time, and even more fitting that I have found myself revisiting the three words that made up my 'New Years Goal' (see: http://thelightbetween.blogspot.com/2008/01/new-year-new-you.html ). My words for 2008 were: Truth, Balance & Community. My goal for this year was to examine each of these words/concepts throughout the year, to discover what they mean to me on an ongoing basis and how they represent my goals for myself this year.

In some ways I could say that community was the 'easiest' concept for me to explore, but I think that had a lot to do with my personal commitment to moving out of my solitary basement living situation and in to Laura & Louis (and Henry)'s lovely house in The Junction neighbourhood at the start of this year. The notion of community is much easier to explore when you make yourself part of one. I also had the opportunity to reflect on definitions of community, and the great importance of community to me, through my three and a half month relocation to St Louis this summer. Yes, living with the same three people that you work with every day, in a two bedroom apartment, in a place that is new and unknown to you definitely forces one to think about the nuances of community via 'communal living.' Furthermore, being away, for an entire season, from the community of loved ones that you've spent 8 years cultivating also forces one to consider the importance of community.

I also feel that I carried the word balance with me throughout the last 9 months with some consistency, even (or perhaps especially) when I was not exactly living in a 'balanced' way. I think that my mere awareness of my tendencies to throw myself so fully (with a sort of 'all or nothing' type of abandon) in to work, or play, or relationships, is really at the core of my exploration of balance. I also feel that, much like nature bursts forth with life and brightness and flowers and fruits in the Spring and Summer, I too burst forth with great energy in these seasons. Thus, as the leaves and trees and plants begin to retreat as the weather cools and the days get shorter in the Fall, I too find myself slowing down and turning inward. To me, this is the ultimate exploration of balance - balancing my life not merely within the scope of a day or a week or a month, but in alignment with the seasons as they unfold over the course of an entire year!

Which brings us finally, to 'truth'. My final frontier? There is a part of me that claims not to even remember why I chose the word truth to be on this list. But then there is a deeper part of me, one without exact words or specific thoughts, that tells me that I do know, and that is what this final phase of 2008 will be about. This time right now is about moving further inward, to discover all the truths that live within me and then summoning the courage to live those truths outwardly. I'm still working on sorting out exactly what that means and how that will work, but I do feel confident that that is the task before me...

And so now I go, to continue working on the work that is my life's work these days: taking care of and doing what's best for me. Will keep ya posted on how it goes as I see fit, but until then,

Happy Autumn! Get out there (or in there) and discover the way that you choose to celebrate this beautiful season that is all about restoring our personal balance, turning inward, giving thanks, and taking in all the life-giving gifts that Spring and Summer gave us, as we prepare to hunker down and dive deep in to the depths of Winter!

NAMASTE