Rapids and All

One of the things that 'The Artist's Way' keeps instructing me to keep an eye out for is synchronicity - that is, the events, emotions, thoughts, ideas, etc. of my life aligning themselves in sometimes surprisingly coincidental sorts of ways. When this happens, according to 'The Artist's Way', it is not coincidence, but rather the universe unfolding exactly as it should be.

As I walked home this evening (okay, it's not evening at all, it's 2:00 in the morning! Anyhow, as I walked home just now...) I found myself reflecting on the fact that it seems like everything that happened to me today was very emotionally synchronized. Perhaps it's simply that I needed an emotional release so much that it was just bound to happen, but I think it was more than that...

One of my favorite quotes from 'The Artist's Way' came from the chapter that I am currently working on and it goes like this:

"Recovery is the process of finding the river and saying yes to it's flow, rapids and all."

And I feel like I have really been trying lately to accept all the currents of the river that I am journeying upon these days - despite the fact that the waters have been less than pleasant.

Today I really tried to just accept that and move forward. Live my life. Or whatever semblance of a life it is that I am living here. I'm not trying to sound pessimistic or complain, because I am actually quite happy in many ways, doing what I am doing, where I am doing it. But I have also been struggling. In any case, I was able to have two really necessary, and really grounding, telephone conversations with two of my best friends today. Followed by a good, however brief, chat with one of my colleagues/roomates here in St Louis this evening, followed by a really good 'movie night in' with two of my new american friends here, where we watched a very cathartic movie.

The details of all of these events is really where the synchronicity lies, but it is my synchronicity after all, so for now I'm keeping it to myself. Suffice it to say, I've had a few good cries today, expressed myself some and felt a little more connected to others and a little more like me than I've been feeling lately.

AMEN!