Things That Break My Heart:

1. Goodbyes
2. Fires that destroy things
3. When death takes our loved ones
4. Lack of communication (also, Miscommunications)
5. War, and its impacts
6. When bad things happen to good people

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Unless you live in a cave, or maybe a country other than Canada, you heard about the massive 6 alarm fire that destroyed practically an entire block of Toronto's famous Queen West last week. It was so surreal, and confusing - incomprehensible even - for me to wake up on Wednesday morning and hear on the radio that Queen Street was closed between Bathurst & Augusta because of a huge fire... WHAT?!?

This is the neighbourhood that I just moved from. (I lived maybe ten blocks or so west from where this fire began) These buildings had been a part of my daily landscape for the last two years, and prior to living in this neighbourhood, I spent a lot of time in this area... Because it was, in many ways, the heart of one of Toronto's hippest 'hoods, and very near to a few theatres that I try to frequent.

So on Thursday, on my way to rehearse his one-man show with my friend Anthony, of course I had to stop by, and pay my respects to these buildings... and the lost livelihood of so many...

B R E A K. M Y. H E A R T.

Ugh, my home burning down is one of my worst nightmares! It is one of only two recurring nightmares that I have ever had in my life. (The other is me drowning in a pit of snakes & spiders - thanks so much for that image Indiana Jones!) I can remember sitting in the backseat of our family car with my fingers crossed each time we returned home after being away for more than a few hours, silently praying as we approached our street, "please let the house not be on fire, please let the house not be on fire, please ..." I'm not sure where that fear comes from, but I was afraid of any kind of fire for a very, very long time. Funnily enough, my brother was afraid of water for a very, very long time. Conundrums.

Well, on a slightly more selfishly heart-breaking note (because it's actually a GREAT thing for my BFF, Alison), check out these pics from Saturday night, which was the Goodbye Party for my Best Friend Alison, who left on Sunday to move to Bathurst, New Brunswick to work for the CBC...

Sad Faces.
Toronto won't be the same without her.

I really don't think that I am exagerrating when I say that the last five years of my life in Toronto have been pretty much defined by my friendship with Alison. We lived together, on good ol' Vermont Avenue in The Annex from Sept '04 to Jan '06 - those were the magical, fantastic, super-fun, memorable, and some might even say infamous 'Sex and the Annex' years! (Some of you may remember that, slightly less mature but definitely juicy and exciting, blog of ours!) Winter '06 was tough when Ali spent the semester at journalism school in DENMARK(!), but upon her return in June '06 we resumed the excellentness of our inseperable friendship. We jokingly call each other "Life Partners."

So yeah, it's tough that she's moving away. I'm so, so, so, so, sooooooo happy for her though! It has been her dream since before she even went to journalism school (at Ryerson) to work for the CBC, and there was never a doubt in my mind that she could do it. So, those of you who are CBC radio listeners, keep an ear out on the national news reports for "Alison Northcott reporting for CBC News, Bathurst."

Well, since this post has been mostly such a downer, here's pic for y'all that should break your heart in the good way, with it's adorableness:

My roomies: Henry & SnoBear, dancing in my room last weekend.
Awwwwwww!

Big Moves, Big News, Intense Days...

Well, I did it. I moved. And I did it the day after the biggest snowstorm of the year, driving a cube van (aka a small TRUCK) and with the generously free labour of my very bestest friends ever!

But I'm not even sure if that is the most intense/exciting/noteworthy event of the last few days...

The last few days have definitely been jam-packed with intensity... From lovely reunions with very old friends, to packing stress, to work stress, to snowstorm stress, and moving stress (which includes but is not limited to anxiety, excitement, grief, optimism, exhaustion and the giddyness that comes beyond exhaustion)... and beyond!

But let's just start "at the beginning" (aka a mere 5 days ago) shall we?

So this is what the day looked like last Saturday morning - my moving day!

And these are pictures of the best moving team, ever!

Above: The Team (0n the load-in end of things); From L to R we have: Devon in front, Alison and Mark in the truck, Thea & Brandon. At my new place, Alison and Brandon were replaced by the amazing Johnny Hall (who can always be counted on to be there for me when I need him!) and my new roomies Laura and Louis.

Above: My Bestest Friends; Mark, Dev & Ali

Would you believe me if I told you that my move, from start to finish, took a mere 2 hours? Well, it did. Thanks to the above pictured (and some not pictured) SUPERSTARS! Sure, I got stuck a few times in the snow driving the cube van, but with what my friends like to call my "freakishly organised" packing style, and the hardest working, most generous and dedicated friends (and new roomies) a girl could wish for, it was all over in just two hours!

And did I mention that I did all this on just two hours of sleep because I stayed up until 5:30am the night before hanging out with an old friend from my Vancouver Youth Theatre days that I hadn't seen for 10 years? 'Cause yeah, that's what happened.

So, once I had returned the cube van (small TRUCK) and the lovely Devon had dropped me off back at home, I unpacked my bedding. Made my first bed in my new home. Took these photos...

My New Room!!!

First Dinner with the new roomies - they treated me to the freshest, tastiest indian food and champagne to celebrate! Yay!!! Below: Louis, Laura & Henry - LOVE!

And then, later that night, after my crazy intense move (and having had just 2 hours of sleep) I went to my long-lost friend David's band's show...

And here he is (below, with me), all growed up... after 10 years... And the totally dynamic and talented bassist of the Vancouver-based band 'Hey Ocean' - they rocked the party big time at The El Mocambo in Toronto on Saturday night!

Of course, all my super fantastic friends were too exhausted after helping me move, so none of them joined me at the Hey Ocean show on Saturday night. So I made some new, super fun (and uh, did I mention YOUNG) friends... We danced up a storm front and centre during the totally energetic and upbeat Hey Ocean show. Good times. Love, love, LOVED IT!

Below: Me and the gorgeous and fun Mor

Below: The Super Fun Girls: Piper, Catherine & Mor!

The following day, February 3rd, was the one year anniversary of my friend Emily's death. So Thea had the really lovely idea of gathering just a few of us together to honour that... I'm really glad that she did. Below: Jenn, Thea & I (Naz was taking the photo). I'll say it again: I'm really thankful that I had the opportunity to gather with other loved ones and think of Emily with love and remember her and laugh and smile and mourn...

On Monday night, Hey Ocean was playing in Hamilton. And it just so happens that my "faux cousin" (aka Holly's neice/Robin's cousin) Lindsay, goes to school there. She's a fun girl whom I figured would be up for a crazy fun adventure so I called her on Monday morning and proposed that I drive out to Hamilton, pick her up from her rehearsal at McMaster University and then take her out to see the amazing Hey Ocean at The PepperJack Cafe in dreary, awful, armpit-of-Ontario, Hamilton. She was in. It was fun. Here we are, with the fun-having:

And the last little bit of exciting news that I have to share is that I have decided that my future holds more exciting, challenging, stimulating and lucrative opportunities for me than working at a bookstore... So, today I gave my notice. As of the end of this month, I will no longer be working for practically no money, doing practically nothing. Hopefully by then some totally fantastically exciting new opportunity will have arisen for me... And if anyone out there has any great offers for me... Be in touch!